Doing the Mambo

Today I learned something new: that the kicks and movements the baby makes in the womb is called “quickening.” Once again I am confounded as to why what everyone calls “kicking” must be labelled “quickening” instead. Why not “twitching” or “spasms” or “doing the mambo?” It’s not quite at the level of 9 months=40 weeks but almost. I scratch my head and realize that all the scratching of my head I’ve been doing is leading to thinning hair. Great. Pregnancy leads to hair loss.

Anyhow the little baby Peach is funny. Yesterday Peach was pretty quiet and not very restless. Normally when Becoming-a-Mom lies down the pending poop-maker takes this as its cue to start kick-boxing and doing donuts in her belly. Not so much yesterday. But today – today I think Peach is churning butter. Little pokes and whole belly-tremor-causing roundhouses are coming from within. Watching her belly bump and quiver is both fascinating and terrifying. I’ve seen too many horror movies to think that this is a good thing. So while I’m repeating quietly to myself that Peach is happily doing the Mambo inside, I’m also making a mental note that perhaps it’s time to make sure there’s a fishing net handy – just in case Peach turns out to be one of those dinosaur-like Aliens that Ripley then spent the next decade trying to destroy.

The whole vision of that happening makes the idea of cutting Peach’s umbilical cord almost pleasant.

Almost.